


That damn coffin

by SmexyWatermelon



Category: Dark Souls (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, M/M, Oneshot, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Sex, genderbender, solaire has cute nosebleeds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-22
Updated: 2016-10-22
Packaged: 2018-08-24 01:13:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,217
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8350519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SmexyWatermelon/pseuds/SmexyWatermelon
Summary: Solaire would have never bedded a man, even if he was the Chosen Undead. But what if a beautiful blue-haired lady approached him?





	

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me I’m not the only one who had dirty thoughts about the sex-changing coffin in DS2.

Nothing felt better after a day of fighting than going to relax in a tiny, secured pond just at the edge of Darkroot Garden; Solaire would have never dreamed of going to such an awful place if it wasn’t for the cat’s promise to keep her ‘funny solar fellow’ safe during those brief pauses from his full time job as an undead-slaughterer. He probably shouldn’t have accepted, but such a chance was so rare he didn’t muster the will to do so.  
When he reached the pond he immediately spotted someone nearby: his hand instinctively reached for the hilt of his sword just to stop midway when he spotted those long, silky curls tracing smooth curves down her back.  
He didn’t feel good at peeking at someone and so he tried to greet the gorgeous stranger, but when he saw her turning in his direction his voice died in his throat and he could just duck among the bushes in front of him, hoping she hadn’t seen him.

Drake frowned at the now-moving bushes, but blamed it on his imagination and resumed cleaning his new body; if anyone wanted to attack him, they were surely welcome to try: he could really use beating someone up at the moment.  
_How could this happen to me? Why does everything always happen to me?!_  
He’d better not let Lautrec know of all of this. He feared his reaction, _any_ kind of reaction (in his mental list, breaking up with him because of his new body wasn’t even in the top ten – he actually feared he might enjoy his new body a whole lot more than him).  
‘What am I going to do with these hair?’ he grasped the locks in his hands: they were so long they almost reached his new curvy buttocks. ‘I get the slim body, soft skin and all that, but why did my hair grow? WHY would I EVER need it to grow?!’  
He had to reach for that damn coffin again as soon as he could: too bad it was well guarded, and without someone’s help - _**not Lautrec’s**_ \- it would have taken him a while to get to it. 

Solaire couldn’t restrain himself from watching her: gods, she was one of the most beautiful creatures he had ever seen, what was she even doing in such a harsh and wicked place as this?  
He leant towards the only opening the bush was offering him, his breath reduced to the least he needed to survive: he had soon noticed the scabbard clasped on her hip, and judging from the scars that were marring her perfect porcelain skin if she were to fight him his victory was anything but certain.  
He tried to gulp but his mouth was feeling extremely dry at the moment: he kept watching as the woman raised her hair above her head, exposing her well-toned back and perfect round butt at him.  
‘My dear Sun, give me the strength…’  
She dived into the water and emerged some seconds later, her skin glistening wherever the sunrays filtering through the leaves touched her.  
Her abundant bosom heavily leant on her chest, her purplish nipples slightly raising every time she breathed, hardening every time she brought more cold water to wash away the dirt and the dust from her chest.  
He licked his lips, his hand darting towards his own inner tight.

“Well, at least I am a hot chick. If I had turned into a fat Mildred I would have surely let myself fall on my sword.” Drake brushed again his hands on his new boobs, weighing up the idea of that coffin being the possible origin of the man eater.  
He realized he enjoyed all the feelings these new body parts were offering him; though he preferred men, he knew how women basically worked. Since he was there, he could have tried testing out his new body’s capabilities…

She suddenly brushed her hands up her stomach and cupped her breasts one more time, squeezing them lightly and clearly enjoying the feeling they gave her. She slipped her lower lip inside her mouth as one of her hands left her bosom and roamed below the water edge.  
‘Is she going to…?’ Solaire barely finished the thought as the woman started moaning, the hand between her thighs slipping even further inside the water and moving in repetitive motions inside and outside of her.  
Every moan that escaped from those plum lips elicited a quite clear answer from his groin, his armor restraining him and getting smaller every time she pushed inside of herself.  
Suddenly he realized blood was dripping down his chin. “Damn it.”  
His old bad quirk had evidently come back: he realized he couldn’t even breath from his nose anymore since blood was filling it, but soon he realized he had got himself in a much larger problem.  
Alarmed by the noise, the beautiful maiden (Drake heavily laughed at this description once he got the chance to hear the tale from Solaire) straightened up and drew the short sword leaning on her left hip. “Who’s there? Don’t make me look for you, I swear I’ll gut-” she froze as Solaire walked out of the bushes, palms raised in surrender.  
“I beg your pardon, milady; it had never been my intention to sneak on you: I was simply searching for this pond but when I laid my eyes upon you I couldn’t help but notice how gracious you looked from afar; I’m terribly sorry for the inconvenience, you have my deepest and sincerest apologies.”

‘What in the fucking hell is happening with my life right now.’  
Drake stared at Solaire, unable to process a coherent answer for the moment. He took a breath to try to speak but he soon turned around and braced his frail form, his dagger still firmly held in his hand.  
“Now… I’ll be on my way. I’m deeply sorry for this accident.” Drake heard his steps slowly getting away from him. ‘Wait, he didn’t…’ he decided to turn around, a terribly mischievous thought forming clearly inside of his mind ‘He really didn’t recognize me??’

“Wait, fair knight!” Solaire stopped dead in his tracks when that sweet voice called for him. “You have come here to bathe, haven’t you? Join me then.” He turned around to politely refuse her generous suggestion, but looked almost immediately at the ground when he remembered she was still naked, facing him.  
“I’m so sorry, but-“ “Come in! The water isn’t too cold…” she caressed the water surface, making tiny wrinkles spread around the pond “…and I know a couple of ways to keep us warm.”  
Solaire tried to gulp again, but his throat was even drier than before, and he felt his cock throbbing against his thigh “A-are you sure? It might be… inconvenient for you.” Solaire looked at the woman, who simply shuffled her arms away from her chest, showing her perfect breasts and temptingly bit her lower lip, tilting her head on one side. “Join me.”  
He had to take care of his boner anyway: it would have been more pleasant in someone else’s company.

Drake stared silently as the knight took off the armor on his forearms and dropped it on the ground. ‘Is he doing it?’ Soon his belt and sword joined them on the ground. ‘Gods he’s doing it!’  
He couldn’t just stand there and watch – he really wanted to get the most out of this, but first he had to get back in character and drop the smirk that was threatening to tear his face apart.  
He paced towards Solaire and touched the armor on his knee, smiling up towards him “Let me help.” He stripped him of the last of his armor and stared as he sat down next to the edge of the mere. He clearly saw blood dripping on his usually white tunic: Drake lifted himself out of the water and reached for his face with one hand. “Are you wounded, my dear?” the knight clearly winced and brought one of his hands at the bottom of his chin, as if remembering just now of that little problem of his. He tried to explain, but faltered anytime he opened his mouth.  
“Mmh, let me take care of it…” Drake knelt next to him and then sat on his lap, reaching for his helmet with a smile.  
“M-milady…!” he lifted Solaire’s helm just enough to be able to lick the blood on his chin: the coppery taste of it was mixed with dust and the salty remnants of dry sweat; who knows how long he had been fighting out there… he surely hadn’t shaved in a few days, since his face was covered with a thick and short shade of blonde beard.  
“What’s the matter?” he chirped in his new voice. Gods, he was starting to see the advantages of the situation.

Other women found his nosebleeds odd, but this one… she found him amusing. What a strange, pleasant surprise.  
“You do taste good…” she dragged her hands on the sides of his helmet and lifted it, exposing his lightly charred lips: he couldn’t see her anymore since the eye-slit of his helmet was misplaced, but when she kissed him he swore she tasted like heaven.  
She then proceeded to remove his helmet completely: he narrowed his eyes, the light outside of that helm almost unbearable. Then, he felt a soft hand grazing his cheek, making him turn to look at the blurred face of his lady: as his eyes adjusted to the new light he noticed she had golden eyes and pale plump lips, and kept smiling at him.  
He meant to tell her something, but found himself completely speechless.  
She eyed his nosebleed, glaring at it curiously “My, if this happened when you saw me, I can just imagine-“ she reached between his legs and palmed his throbbing cock through his pants “Oh. Eager, aren’t we?” Solaire bashfully smiled, his ears quickly turning into a deep shade of red, matching the one painted on his cheeks.  
“What is your name?” he panted.  
“Do you really need one?” she gracefully batted her eyelashes, before leaning towards him and whispering in his ear “You may call me whatever you want, sweetheart.”  
Her nimble fingers undid knots and unbuttoned clothes very quickly, taking layers of chainmail off him with a smile plastered on her face.  
She opened his shirt and dragged it off his shoulders, taking the chance to straddle his lap one more time and brush herself against his thigh: the rough feeling the leathery texture against her tender skin gave her painted a blissful expression on her face. Solaire grimaced: his cock kept hardening and it was getting painful, restrained as he was inside of his last article of clothing.  
When she looked at his face she crawled backwards and motioned him to sit up: the lady pressed herself one more time against his body, the warmth coming from her breasts spreading quickly against his chest; Solaire wound his arms around her hips and pulled her into another soft, gentle kiss, which she demandingly deepened almost immediately.  
She reached again for his cock, who was painfully outlined by his tight pants: she yanked his pants low enough to put her hand inside of it and finally releasing Solaire’s cock, which wobbled lightly because of its stiffness. She wrapped it with her tiny hand and pressed her thumb on its slit, making Solaire wantonly moan.  
Her hand slowly stroked him, her eyes registering his every movement as she kept pleasuring him. She picked up the pace, and Solaire grunted every time her silky palm reached his hilt; he dragged his hands on her sides and dug his fingers in her bottom, biting his lower lip until he almost broke the skin.  
She made her other hand slip between her own thighs, stroking her folds and moaning with him; he opened his eyes to look at her: her eyes were glistening with lust, and that glare was enough to send something straight to his groin.  
He couldn’t resist anymore: he needed to eat her up.  
He pushed her underneath him, savoring her lips one more time: she moaned in the kiss and panted a little when he reached for her slit and slipped a finger past her lips.

Drake was startled by the foreign feeling: masturbating with his soft womanly hands was a thing, but Solaire’s finger was harsh, calloused and – most of all – thick. He felt his head spinning as Solaire kept kissing down his chest and between his boobs, pulling inside and outside of him at an excruciatingly slow pace; it actually started to hurt him: this new body had never actually had sex before, no wonder Solaire’s hands were too much for it right away.  
Solaire kissed down his hips and added another digit inside of him, making Drake cover his mouth as he was stretched even further.  
“Is… something wrong?” Drake didn’t reply, just shook his head and tried to look convinced enough not to make him stop. “Milady?” Solaire immediately stopped, his other hand reached for his face and brushed away a tear that Drake hadn’t realized he had shed.  
“Are you… still a virgin?” “I…guess so?” it was too hard to explain right now. Besides, he didn’t know himself.  
“Do you want me to stop?” “Heavens, no.” Drake gave Solaire a warm smile. He playfully pushed his head back towards his groin “Just get back to work. I’ll be fine.”  
Solaire licked his lips while reaching for his vulva. “As you wish, ma’am.”

He opened her outer lips, almost admiring the pink clit sticking out of those blue curls. He circled it with his lips and sucked lightly, watching the lady’s reaction. He started pumping again inside of her, trying to stretch her and prepare her for his cock but at the same time pleasuring her as best he could.  
She loudly moaned and he lifted her thigh above his shoulder to get a better angle; he kept sucking and licking at her clit until he could add a third finger inside of her without causing her pain.  
He then raised himself to get a better look at the body sprawled before him, without stopping his pumping motions and keeping massaging her exposed clit with the pad of his thumb: she kept wiggling and moaning, breathing whenever she could; the whimpering mess before him tensed up and closed her eyes, pushing her lips together in a thin line as her inner walls twitched around his fingers, knuckle-deep inside of her. Before her orgasm could stop, he pulled out of her and wound his arms around the back of her thighs, pushing them above his shoulders and eating her pussy while she was still screaming underneath him: he stuck his tongue inside of it, massaging the overstimulated flesh until it stopped throbbing.  
She stopped moving, her body completely limp: with heavy-lidded eyes she searched for him, a feeble sound escaping her lips.  
“S-solaire…” he let go of her body and laid on top of her, leaning on his elbows and hugging her tiny form to his body. He felt her fingers caressing the back of his head and sinking between his blonde locks, undoing his already messed up ponytail, her lips ghosting on his ear. “How do you know my name?” he murmured, their groins pleasingly near to each other’s. She licked her lips. “I just… know.”  
He broke their hug and raised slightly on top of her, cupping her face and moving a couple of strands away with his thumbs: they locked their gazes for mere seconds before Solaire kissed her fiercely, his cock brushing against her vagina in repetitive and heavy motions.  
She clung to his shoulders, sinking her nails into them; whenever he pressed his length against her her nails pressed against his back, drawing blood from his thick skin. She then pressed against his shoulders and made him roll underneath her: for being so little she was really strong; her amber eyes hungrily glared at him: she pressed her lips against his one more time before standing up and diving inside of the water with a splash, emerging from it and taking away some wet strands of hair that were shielding her view.  
“Well? Aren’t you coming?” Solaire stood up and almost tripped in his pants as he pushed them away and joined the lady inside of the pond.  
She led him towards the center of it, turning around and winding her arms around his shoulders with a smile; she lifted her legs and wrapped them around his hips: Solaire lightly caressed them before aligning himself with her entrance. ”Are you ready, love?”  
“Always.” She purred, pushing down on his length with a sigh and letting it slip inside her pussy. Solaire bucked his hips shallowly, careful not to hurt her. After a little while she grinned again “Go on, I’m not made of glass.” “I’m so afraid of… breaking you.” His hips bucked slightly deeper inside of her “You won’t.” she reassured, kissing him again and softly slipping her tongue past his lips.  
Solaire picked up a pace and soon lost control, pounding inside of her without restraints. She sounded in pain, but she never stopped him in any way: he lowered his head and started leaving a trail of kisses down her breasts until he reached her nipple, which he took inside his mouth and pinched lightly between his teeth. He heard her moan his name as her walls tightened around his cock: when he looked up at her she had her eyes closed and her mouth left agape, riding her second orgasm that evening.  
“S-solaire-“ a tiny whine escaped from her lips, pleading him to slow down a bit, but the warrior had no intention to do so. He kept sucking her nipple, his hand carefully traveling down her body until it reached again her clit: he slipped two fingers between her lips and stroked her with a circular movement, their bodies hot against the icy water. “Solaire! I’m so… close…”  
She dug her fingers in his shoulders and clenched her teeth, her body coming undone one more time; Solaire’s overstimulated body couldn’t stand the sight of that beautiful goddess-like creature panting and sweating above him, bathed in the last sunlight of the day: he buried himself deep and spurted his seed inside of her with a grunt.  
They remained close to each other without moving, their breaths the only noise filling the air since the animals had all been scared by their screams.  
He pulled out of her and helped her get down, keeping her trembling form in place by placing his hands on her sides.

They found a spot where the water wasn’t too deep: Solaire laid on it and Drake pressed the side of his face against his chest, listening to his heart deeply thumping inside of it. He exhaled deeply and closed his eyes, while Solaire placed a kiss on the top of his head and intertwined his fingers between his long, silky blue locks, randomly playing with them and curling the strands between his fingers.

“Ah…” Drake exhaled again, his mind peacefully drifting asleep. “That’s what the hair is for.”

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry if it’s a bit confusing – I tried to let Drake think at himself as a male and Solaire referring to him as a female. If I messed it up too badly let me know and I’ll rewrite the pronouns.  
> 


End file.
